Forbidden Thoughts
by Sparklingstream
Summary: I stink at titles. What if you weren't aloud to think. What if Shecats were here to mate and thats it.What if you had no opinion. well you better get used to it. My name is Leafkit and this is my story. Rated T for safety.
1. Prologue

**Yay This is my first** **Fanfic. I hope you guys like it and review**

Prologue

I don't know why its like this. None of us no why its like this. All I know is that my name is Leafpaw and this is my story. I am a black she-cat with white paws and a white tipped tail and green eyes.

When I was born I was taken to my leader Saberstar. I was crying and yowling. But Saberstar had a strange power. A power to control our thoughts. When I entered his den he looked at me straight in the eye.

" Hush" he meowed sinisterly never wavering his gaze. I silenced myself.

"Surrender me your mind little kit" He meowed with an evil grin. "I will" I meowed transfixed by his soothing words.

"Good little kit from now on your name will be Leafkit until you get you breeding name." He meowed still staring. "Now, what is your name kit?" He asked. "My name is Leafkit." I meowed simply. "Good! Now go!" He meowed as I left.

A moon later Saberstar got on highrock and announced to the clan to come.

"A moon ago three kits were born: Leafkit, Sunkit (A handsome golden tom with blue eyes), and Icekit (A white tome with icy blue eyes and a silvery mask around his eyes). Leafkit your future mate will be Icekit. Sunkit you must wait for the next arrival of kits. Leafkit you may now join the rest of the she-cats." He meowed pointing to the cluster of she-cats.

"Yes master Saberstar" I meowed walking toward the group.

"Sunkit and Icekit you may join the males" "Yes Saberstar" The meowed padding to the other group.

It is with those she-cats I learned my destiny. I was here to give birth to Icekits future children.

In my clan Oakclan she-cats weren't allowed to do anything. I learned that she-cats are supposed to mate and thats it. We stayed in a den and weren't supposed to leave ever. We were dependent on our mate. They were the ones that brought us food and water. Without them we could never survive.

When I was a kit i didn't understand how miserable my life was going to be. But as I grew older I realized the horror that was to come.

** Yeah I know it's short but its late and I'm tired. Hopefully I'll have chapter 1 tomorow **


	2. Chapter 1

**Wow you guys rock! I did one short chapter and already I'm getting reviews. Cyber cookies for everyone! Oh her let me answer your reviews:**

**Grace of Masbolle: Thanks I'm glad you like it!**

**Fluxfeather: Thanks I'm glad to know you like it that much**

**Adderstar: I'm not sure if thats a complement or not but thanks for reviewing.**

**Streamheart: Thanks for reviewing cause I Love smiley faces. Yay smiley faces:)**

**Troublestripe: Thanks for the advice!**

Chapter 1

As I got older my mind had more freedom. When I was about 6 moons old I could think on my own. Icepaw (He had turned in to an apprentice already) didn't really visit me. When he did it was just to give me some prey and a bit of water. He'd also scratch me if I didn't say thankyou after he gave me food. What was I to do. By my clans rules he pretty much owned me and I had to obey him. But unlike him Sunpaw came often. He would tell me everything he learned as an apprentice like how to catch a mouse or a certain fighting move. He'd also play with me. He was always so nice to me as opposed to my mate Icepaw. I began to get fond of him and that's where everything started going wrong.

One day when I was 8 moons old Icepaw came to visit me with a mouse in his jaw.

"Here" He meowed simply dropping the mouse.

I leaned forward to pick it up when he scratched hard on my forehead. With Blood dripping from my head I yowled with pain.

"You stupid furball! I keep telling you you have to say thank you before taking the mouse! Now what do you say?"

"Thanks" I sighed.

Then as I reached to grab it once more he pushed me away hitting me where he had scratched before. I winced in pain and stopped.

"Hold on!" He meowed biting a huge chunk of my meal. "There that's what you get for not saying thank-you" He meowed as he left.

I looked at the scraps and gobbled them up quickly when Sunpaw came in. He imediately came rushing to me.

"What happened? Why are you bleeding?" He meowed worriedly.

"Icepaw happened " I spat.

"He hurt you again?" He said beginning to lick the wound.

"Yeah" I said wincing in pain.

His handsome golden fur touching mine. He suddenly stopped.

"Oh Leafkit..." He meowed.

" What? Whats wrong?" I asked beginning to worry. "

"Leafkit every time I see you. I get this tingling feeling. Not a bad tingling feeling but a good one.What I'm trying to say Leafkit is that I love you." He meowed.

"Oh Sunpaw I love you to but I'm Icepaw's mate not yours" I meowed burying my head into his golden fur. "We cant be together" I meowed sadly lifting my head.

"There must be someway " He meowed. He looked out the den. "Shoot its Sunhigh, I gotta go! Bye Leafkit." He meowed leaving.

"Bye Sunpaw" I meowed as the cat I loved left the den.

**Well there's chapter 1 Longer than last time! Hope you guys like it!**


	3. Chapter 2

**Hello people! Sorry i didn't update but i just finished school friday so I wanted to relax. Anyway lets answer some reviews**

**Streamheart: Yay for smiley power:) :( :P :0 o:)**

**Troublestripe: Glad you liked it. **

**Freeheart: Thank you, sorry about the errors**

**Adderstar: Yep Cloudtail is a jerk! He has no idea how brightheart feels when he hangs out with thta barn cat (What was her name again? looks foolish) **

**Demon Kitty Girl: Thanks for reviewing! Leafkit: Supaw is mine you cant have him! Sunpaw: Umm... Me: Oh stop it you two!**

**xx-Secrets-xx: I dont mind at all. Take it. Me plot es su plot**

**Willowcloud: Thanks for liking it. Leafkit: Glares evily He is mine! Take him instead! Puts Icepaw in front and runs away with Sunpaw**

**Well for all you Sunpaw lovers this chappie is Sunpaw POV+ its longer  
**

I woke up as the shining morning light filled the apprentice den. I sat up and stretched my muscles. I then began grooming my messy yellow fur. When i was finished I left the den. I decided to visit Leafkit. She always brightened up my morning. Her pretty emerald eyes always put a smile on my face. I enterred her den and saw her sitting up and grooming herself.

"Hi Sunpaw! What are you doing here this early?" She meowed her voice full have hapiness.

"I came here to say hi" I meowed trying to hide what i really wanted her to know.

" Oh Sunpaw, I know what your thinking, But we just cant be together." She meowed pressing her pelt against mine.

"There has to be a way" I meowed " There just has to be"

"I'm sorry sunpaw, I want to believe too but as long as Saberstar is leader it just isn't going to work" She meowed her face saddening. "You should go now. Remember you gotta goand feed the clan." She meowed smiling.

I nodded and left. Sadness filng my heart to the brim. I didn't want to hunt! I didn't want to fight. I just wanted Leafkit. The I heard the voices of the other apprentices.

"Icepaw you are so lucky! Leafkit is like the prettiest she-cat in the clan. Far prettier then my mat Cherrypaw" Meowed one of the apprentices named stripedpaw.

"I know. She is like a trophy to me. Our kits will be the best looking and the stronguest. The only problem is how she behaves. But a couple scratches will fix that." Icepaw replied

"What" I meowed anger rising. "She's your trophy! You probably dont know anything about her!"

"It doesn't matter what she likes. Besides what to you know about mates you dont even have one!" He hissed back.

This was true. I had refused to have a mate because i thought it was wrong to own a cat.

"I dont have one cause you should fall in love with what ever cat you want. Plus the way you treat her is wrong." I meowed my claws unsheathed.

" What do you mean I treat her wrong! And why do you have such an interest in my mate" He growled at me.

I knew i couldn't respond to that. I didn't know what to do. I could apoligize or I could attack. Icepaw was stronger than me but i just couldn't apologize. So I leaped on to him. He yowled in suprise and started scratching me. I bit his shoulder and tried not to let go as he scratch my belly until it began to bleed. While all of this was happening i could her the apprentices yelling: Fight! Fight! I knew I was going to lose but I still fought. Then I felt light headed and I began to fly in the sky. Icepaw had thrown me off with his hind legs. I hit the ground hard. I couldn't get up for a couple of seconds. But then again I didn't want toget up. I looked up to see Icepaw looking down at me his shoulder bleeding.

"This fight is over" He meowed kicking sand in my face as he left with the other apprentices following him.

As soon as they left i sat up and began licking my wounds. My stomach was the worst hit from the fight. I knew this scratches were going to hurt for weeks but it was better thtan answering the questioned that jepardized my relationship with Leafkit. All i knew now was that I was to tired to hunt I just wanted to sleep so I did.

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When I woke it was late everyone was asleep except for me. My stomach growled and my bones ached. I decided to fetch something to eat in the fresh kill pile.It is there while eating my vole I relized something. Everyone was asleep. That meant I could hang out with Leafkit. Excitement creeped up my furas I finished the vole and quietly padded to Leafkits den. I found her quietly sleeping on a bed of moss.

"Leafkit wake up." Iwhispered softly in her ear poking her side.

"Huh what? Sunpaw? Is it sunrise already?" She whispered drowsily.

"Far from it. Come outside with me" I meowed.

"What do you mean outside?" She asked slowly waking up.

"Outside the camp" I meowed excitement getting to me.

"But i'm not supposed to leave the camp. " She meowed sitting up.

"Leafkit everyone is asleep. Dont you want to see the outside world."

"Well... Ok" She meowed curiosity getting the best of her.

"Great follow me" I whispered leaving the den.

I was so happy. I was going to show leafkit the wonder of the outside world and I'd get to be alone with her to talk without the clan rules pressing against us.

**Well thats the end of the chappie. **

**Leafkit: Why did you have to reward the people who like my Sunpaw. **

**Me: Because they reviewed! **

**Leafkit: Glares**

**Me: Yikes what if I give you your breeder name next chappie. **

**Leafkit: Ok Smiles inocently (But beware reviewers who love Sunpaw) **

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	4. Chapter 3

**Yes I'm alive. See I've been real busy and stuff but from now on I'll try to update once a week or sooner. So yeah. Oh i've also decided to do it from now on in the 3 person cause its easier. Thanks to all who reviewed!**

Leafkit looked outside and was amazed by all the trees, sounds, and smells that flooded her mind. She ran out the wind in her face not caring about her clans rules. Enjoying herself for the first.

"Sunpaw its amazing" Leafkit meowed looking around in awe.

She ran up to him and pressed her face into his golden fur. Only there did she feel at peace. Sunpaw looked down at her and licked her ears affectionately.

"Leafkit I love you, you know that right" He meowed looking at her.

"I love you to Sunpaw but if they clan finds out we can be in trouble and Icepaw he won't be happy." She meowed worry filled her.

"I know but what if it was a secret? We could meat out here every night and the clan wouldn't even know." He said hopefully. "Leafkit I can't go on like this… I can't bear to be away from you."

"Well… Ok Sunpaw I'll do it for you" She meowed.

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Icepaw woke up as the early morning light filled the apprentice den. He had been training for 5 moons and knew his warrior ceremony was coming. He couldn't wait. It was still early and everyone else was still asleep. Well almost everyone as he soon found out. He was about to leave the den when he heard voices from the outside. He decided to listen.

"Bye Sunpaw" a voice whispered lowly so that Icepaw had to strain to hear it.

"Bye Leafkit see you tonight." Another voice meowed softly.

Icepaw's sleepy eyes flew open with shock. What was Sunpaw doing with his mate! He thought angrily. He stepped out of the den to see Sunpaw stretching in the morning sun.

"Hi Icepaw!" Sunpaw meowed happily.

"Hey Sunpaw, you seem awfully happy and tired. Did anything happen last night?" He meowed.

"Nope just didn't sleep as well as I used to" Sunpaw said calmly.

"Oh ok well I'm going to go and give Leafkit my **mate**some food since she is in fact my **mate**" He meowed peering into Sunpaw's eyes.

"Ok " Sunpaw meowed simply as he walked up to his mentor.

_Sunpaw you are one tough cookie to crack but I'll get you don't you worry_ (A/N: I know they don't know what cookies are but I just felt like saying that) He thought staring at the golden warrior. _Maybe Leafkit will crack instead_ He thought again smiling as he headed for her den.

He entered her den with a vole in his mouth.

"Here you go Leafkit" He meowed.

Leafkit took the piece and then realized she'd forgotten to say thanks and withdrawed in defense. When no attack came she looked up at Icepaw.

"What is going on?" She meowed scared.

"Nothings wrong I just came to chat with my mate nothing wrong with that."He meowed smiling.

"I guess not" She meowed yawning before beginning to eat her prey.

"You seem tired" Icepaw meowed.

"Yeah I guess I'm not getting as much sleep as I used to. " She said biting into her vole.

"Really? That's interesting. Sunpaw said the same thing." He meowed looking at her suspiciously.

"What are you getting to?" She meowed.

"Oh it's just when I got up I heard voices." He said

"Well maybe you should talk to the medicine cat about that." She said simply finishing her vole.

"Not those kind of voices! Your voice and Sunpaw's voice. And all I wanted to know is what you were doing with him."

"I haven't even seen Sunpaw since yesterday morning! Are you accusing me your own mate of being disloyal to my clan!" Leafkit meowed angrily flicking her tail to the exit.

Icepaw got the message and left. _I know they're up to something… The only way to find out is tonight. _He thought.

**Oh and before I forget ** **Rubytail I kinda know where the whole stories going but thanks for the idea. But I like the name Icefang cause its kinda evil so thanks! Please review!**

**Hugs,**

**Sparkles  
**


	5. Chapter 4

**I know the**** naming ceremony was supposed to be last chapter but I decided to do it now. Oh and people I'm sorry about the commas ok. ****I just always forget about them so sorry. Anyway on to the story!**

Leafkit watched as Icepaw left her den. As soon as he left her true emotions surfaced, her face painted with fear and worry. _Oh Sunpaw Icepaw's suspicious! This isn't going to __work._ She thought sitting up to look at the camp. Sunpaw was talking to his mentor, Saberstar was ordering a group of warriors around and Icepaw was leaving for a patrol. She turned back to Sunpaw who now had a face of excitement and was jumping around. Then he raced towards her.

"Leafkit, Icepaw and I are getting our warrior names tonight and you're getting your breeder name." He meowed, his eyes shining.

"That's great!" She replied.

She was sick of her name it was as if she was born yesterday but not anymore. She smiled at him, happiness surging through her and then it stopped. It stopped as she remembered the morning's events with Icepaw.

"Leafkit, what's wrong?" Sunpaw meowed staring at her worried expression.

"Icepaw is suspicious." She meowed simply looking into blue sapphire eyes.

"Don't worry about Icepaw." He replied giving a comforting lick on the head. "I got to go, bye Leafkit." He continued leaving the den.

"Bye Sunpaw." She meowed, still worried as she sat in her den.

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Sunpaw couldn't sit still as he watched saberstar climb up Big Rock.

"We are gathered here today to give 2 apprentices there warrior name, Icepaw come forward." Saberstar yowled to the clan.

Icepaw, who had been sitting next to him, got up and walked to his leader.

"Do you Icepaw promise to uphold the warrior code even at the cost of your life?" Saberstar meowed.

"I do"

"Then by this day forth you shall be known as Icefang, Sunpaw come forward." Saberstar meowed

Sunpaw's pelt tingled as he walked up to his leader, excitement shone in his eyes, as he waited for the question that all apprentices wait for.

"Do you Sunpaw promise to uphold the warrior code even at the cost of your life?" Saberstar questioned.

Sunpaw hesitated, wasn't he already breaking the warrior code by loving Leafkit?

"I do" He said hiding the shakiness in his voice.

"Then from this day forth you will be known as Sunclaw."

The clan cheered the names of the two new warriors. "Icefang! Sunclaw! Icefang! Sunclaw!" They chanted but were then silence by the leader.

"We also gather here today to give Leafkit her breeder name, Leafkit come forward." Saberstar continued.

Sunclaw watched as Leafkit stepped forward to receive her new name.

"Leafkit do you promise to have at least one litter of kits in your lifetime?"

"I do" She replied, her soothing voice making Sunpaw's ears tingle.

"Then from this day forth you shall be known as Leafstorm." The leader said.

Then the clan cheered once more all three names. "Leafstorm! Icefang! Sunclaw!"

Sunclaw padded toward camp entrance where he was supposed to hold a vigil with Icefang. He sat there next to Icefang for a while in silence before Icefang began to talk.

"Leafstorm is real pretty isn't she" He meowed.

"She is beautiful and you're lucky to have her" Sunclaw meowed looking at his paws.

"Why do you hang out with her so much, she is my mate." The white tom meowed.

"Because we're friends, Is that so bad? Why can't we just be friends?" Sunpaw asked looking at Icefang.

"You are lying. I can see the way you look at her and I know you don't want to be just friends." Icefang replied, looking at the golden tom.

Sunclaw didn't look at the white tom's Icy stare and instead looked at his paws. _Someone help me! I love Leafstorm to much to lose her._He thought, sadness enveloping his yellow body.

** Icefang didn't find out yet ****because**** Sunclaw couldn't sneak out with Leafstorm because of the vigil. Also the can talk because they don't believe in Starclan. Well actually they don't know of Starclan. Oh I have a contest! I need names for three kits: 2 toms and a she-cat. The tom names can be anything but the she-cats name has to be something mysticalish(I know that's not a word but whatever). Oh and Sunclaw plushies for everyone who reviews!**

**Sparkles **


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